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Justin Bieber Peacocks After Being Rescued by Bodyguards in Fight: ‘Not a Scratch on This Pretty Boy’

Why hesitate when you've got 400+ pounds of backup?
Justin Bieber and His Bodyguards Get in a Fight in Cleveland
Instagram/@justinbieber
Instagram/@justinbieber

Justin Bieber posted a very sweet and sheltered pair of photos on his IG this afternoon in response to the many, many, many reports that he got in a fight last night in Cleveland. In the first, he wrote, “Not a scratch on this pretty boy,” alongside a photo of himself looking very pretty-boy indeed. The second, his best attempt at a smirk, was originally captioned “No hesitation,” but he quickly deleted the caption and let the photo stand on its own. A few minutes later, he deleted the first photo (shown above) altogether.

Right, so let us all take a moment here to reflect on the fact that Justin Bieber doesn’t have to hesitate, because he is always trailed by a bodyguard or three. He can throw himself into the shark tank, and there will always be someone to retrieve him. While we appreciate his attempts at stuntin’ as much as the next person, it’s a little Emperor’s New Clothes–y to pretend like the Biebs is the champ in this situation. Also, when did it become OK to condone throwing punches?

As an eyewitness tells it, Bieber “had a friend about his size with him, and there was a bodyguard or two,” ET reports. “Bodyguards only stepped in after Bieber hit the deck.… The bodyguards broke it up, and security cleared everyone out pretty quickly.” These guys literally get paid to keep Bieber’s face pretty and free of scratches.

In case you somehow missed it, see the fight below (at regular speed as well as in gratuitous slow-mo). Also, keep scrolling for a screenshot of his original post (avec caption) via Grammio, lest you think we made it up. Nope: You can’t make this shit up.

justin-bieber

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