Gerry Turner Reveals the ‘Deafening’ Moment He Knew He Wanted to Divorce Theresa Nist in Book Excerpt: ‘I Am Not a Liar’ (Exclusive)
Jason Pham
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After getting engaged in the finale of the first season of The Golden Bachelor, Gerry Turner and his winner, Theresa Nist, married in front of millions of at-home viewers in a televised wedding special on January 4, 2024. They announced their divorce three months later on Good Morning America. In an excerpt from his new book, Golden Years: What I’ve Learned From Love, Loss, and Reality TV , Gerry details the “deafening” moment he knew he and Theresa were over. Read the exclusive Golden Years excerpt below.
On Friday, Theresa knocked off work a bit early to drive to Angie’s house so we could attend Charlee’s volleyball tournament the next day. Angie’s husband, Rob, drove all of us to the huge venue in downtown Indy, where over a hundred teams were participating. The point of the day was to spend family time watching volleyball, but I can’t deny that I really enjoyed the part where people kept coming up to me to take pictures. (Of course, I happily obliged.) Unfortunately, Theresa didn’t find my Indiana fan base quite as fun. Several times, I caught her expression when someone asked me for a photo, and although we didn’t know each other as well as I would have liked, I could tell she was not pleased. I tried my best to include her, but either she or the fan would be reluctant, which only served to increase the tension.
The week, which had started with the dream of connection and romance, deteriorated into both of us going through the motions—and not all that well. There was no animosity, no quarreling. In fact, there wasn’t much emotion at all. Instead, there was a near-constant low hum of conflict as we continued to confront our differences in schedules, eating habits, and plans to see each other. As if highlighting our incompatibility, several times during her visit, Theresa looked around at the countryside and said with a shudder, “There is just no way I could live here. It is so isolated.”
I drove Theresa to the airport for her flight home, and it was one of the most uncomfortable car rides of my adult life. The differences between East Coast and Midwestern mentalities had become painfully apparent. I remembered that during the drive to my house from the airport, struck by the miles and miles of farmland rolling by her, she’d suggested that it should be developed with condos, shopping malls, and industrial parks. “It just seems like such a waste of all this space,” she said.
I was flabbergasted at the notion that anyone would want to destroy such nourishing beauty. “Theresa, these farmers would rather sell one of their children than sell these farms, which in some cases have been in their families for over a hundred years,” I said. I was being a bit hyperbolic, but I couldn’t believe her reaction to the sight of agricultural land was to want it razed for more Starbucks and Lululemon storefronts.
With more distance between us than ever before, we shared a horribly awkward goodbye at the airport. The light kiss on the cheek and gentle hug we exchanged had all the warmth of a meeting between distant cousins. I was relieved the week was over, and I bet Theresa was too.
In the weeks that followed, I was uncomfortable remembering the vows I had spoken at our wedding. “As long as I live, I promise to love you, I promise to be there for you in the last chapter of our lives, and I make this promise with one thousand percent certainty,” I said. “I love you, Theresa, with all my heart.”
There was such conflict raging within me. I am not a liar, but was what I’d said in front of all our guests and millions of viewers the truth? Willing to make concessions for the marriage to survive, I had constantly been asking Theresa, “Do we have room to compromise? Do we have an area where we can find happiness with each other?” By the time she left Indiana, however, I could no longer see any path forward for us. The ambivalence was deafening.
Adapted from GOLDEN YEARS by Gerry Turner, publishing on November 4, 2025. Copyright © 2025 by Gerry Turner. Used by arrangement with Grand Central Publishing, a division of Hachette Book Group. All rights reserved.
